by Bruce Kasanoff

Rule number one: Treat people like people, even online

You wouldn’t give a party and never even talk to any of your guests, so when you post something online, be sure to reply to contents and engage others in conversation. Be warm and curious. Ask questions to show interest. Listen, learn and give positive feedback.

Rule number two: Be human, not perfect

No one likes a know-it-all. Don’t act like you have everything figured out and all you do is share your wisdom. If you choose to share pieces of your life online, share the good, bad and ugly. Take others on your journey of living and learning. Don’t be a caricature ; be the real you.

Rule number three: Be interesting and interested

Find the intersection of what matters most to others as well as you. By “others”, I mean people with whom you’d like to hang out in the real world. Instead of posting the first thing that comes into your head, take the time to craft something that’s both genuine and reasonably creative. Choose your words carefully (fewer are better) and if possible, add a visual. After you post, re-read rule number one: engage others in conversation.

Quick tips:

Serve, don’t sell. Everything you share on social media and every time you reach out to others should offer a benefit to whomever is on the receiving end.

One message at a time. If you have two ideas, create two separate posts (not one). This is the path to clarity. Keep each post short, simple and to the point.

Thou shall not brag. The more you talk about your own achievements, the harder it is for other people to relate to you.

Ask great questions. Simply sharing your “wisdom” gets old, but sharing insightful questions helps people solve their own problems.

Lead with a hook, and pay it off. Your hook grabs attention and promises a benefit. Once you have that attention, you need to deliver that benefit.

Give away good ideas. If you are tempted to hide your best ideas behind some sort of a paywall, resist that temptation. Put your best ideas out there for all to see.

Promote others. Executive career coach and New York Times bestselling author, Bonita Thompson advises that you partner with other individuals whose work complements your own. Promote their project and ask them to promote yours; this is a much better alternative than self-promotion.

Expand your swim lane. It pays to be known for something specific. But if you repeat the same messages too often, you will get bored and so will others. So after you master one skill, learn another skill on the side, until people are willing to pay you to share that one, too.

Be clear and truthful. The clearer you are at saying what you want, the more likely you are to get it.

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