Resonance is getting the timing and frequency just right, so that the energy you put into a system adds to the energy that’s already there. When there’s more resonance in your life, you are either adding energy to other people and/or having them add energy to you.

The simplest way to think of this is pushing a child on a swing. If you time your push just right, when her momentum towards you is gone and she is about to swing the other way, you’ll deliver a great ride. But if you mistime your push or its intensity, you’ll have one unhappy kid.

In a great conversation, you listen intently when the other person is on a roll, sharing their experiences and insights. Wherever possible, you encourage them, build on their ideas, demonstrate your grasp of their messages and express gratitude. When you share, they react in a similar manner. You get in sync, perhaps both leaning forward.

This is precisely how I help my clients to move through the world.

Resonance also manifests in more subtle ways. Yesterday in the gym, I sat down at the shoulder press machine, my weakest and most dreaded station. But my body felt good at the beginning, and as I lifted, my mind wandered to a story I read a few hours earlier about Olympic skier Jessie Diggins and her ability to withstand pain. That got me a few more reps.

Then a strange thing happened. I became aware of the strength of my grip and that feeling instantly traveled down my arms to my shoulders. I perceived my arms and shoulders as one powerful unit, instead of my normal perception that my shoulders were the weak link. I kept going until my maximum time on the machine elapsed, never reaching failure. (In our training system, we are supposed to fail, which means we gave it all we had.)

Thinking about this afterwards, my “Jessie” thought resonated with my body to add strength, and then something deeper resonated with how strong I felt and my endurance leapt off the charts.

Here’s the craziest part: my shoulders and arms weren’t shaking when I finished that set, as they usually are on far less impressive days. Even this morning, they aren’t sore at all.

This is why resonance fascinates me. It’s not just a set of occurrences governed by physics. There’s also a mysterious side to resonance, one that sometimes emerges when you are in sync with another person or creature, nature, or the the universe itself.

This is what I wish for you:

Resonate.

Don’t persuade or perform.

Don’t seek to impress.

Resonate.

Communicate such a way that something inside another person quietly says yes.

Not because you trapped them with logic or cleverness.

Because they recognize something present in you. A truth they already knew but lacked the words to describe. A feeling they had been carrying without fully knowing. A possibility that was waiting for permission.

To resonate is to become more fully yourself in public.

I’m Bruce Kasanoff, and I can help you resonate.

For many years, I’ve been helping clients find a single point of alignment—a kind of hidden doorway—between themselves and the people who matter most to them.

I call it the Resonance Point.

It’s the overlap between what deeply matters to you and what resonates with your extended network—not just followers or customers, but also people you’d gladly speak with if you found yourselves in the same room.

When you find this point, things shift. Communication gets easier. Meaning deepens. Opportunities ripple outward, often in surprising ways.

Here’s the hard part: most people can’t locate this point on their own.

I can find it quickly for others, but I still struggle to find it for myself. That’s the nature of resonance: it needs reflection.

Too many entrepreneurs treat this like a mass-marketing exercise. They want to resonate with 10 million people.

But resonance doesn’t scale like that.

Zoom in. The closer you get to what truly, unmistakably matters to you, the more others feel it. But not everyone will. That’s okay. You’re not here for everyone.

Then comes the final step: Of the things that matter most to you, which ones also matter deeply to your people?

This is where most impulses collapse. They’re either too self-focused, or too generic. They miss the sweet spot.

As a ghostwriter and executive coach, I often serve as an advocate for my client’s network. I listen for the 10% of what they say that has real value for others… and gently discard the rest.

It’s not that the other 90% isn’t interesting. It’s just not resonant.

For example, most people don’t care that I get hungry at 11 a.m. or that a mosquito ruined my night. But they might care when I write about navigating a challenge they also face… especially if I do it with clarity and heart.

Some rare people naturally hit their Resonance Point. I had dinner with one of them last night. She’s so aligned with her calling that she doesn’t even think in terms of audience. She just shows up, soul-first.

For the rest of us, it takes reflection, feedback, and usually another pair of eyes.