People are so terrified of these four words that I couldn’t even put them in the title, because NO ONE would read this post:
What do you want?
A client of mine gets asked for advice, a lot. Before he answers, he asks the other person, “What do you want?”
Most people don’t have a good answer.
In this case, my client tells them, “Then it doesn’t matter what advice I give you.”
You probably already know that other people—your boss, spouse, clients, and colleagues—expect you to have at least a basic answer to this question. Even a receptionist will ask you a variation of the question, “How may I help you?”
If you’re like most people, you lie.
You make up an answer to “What do you want?”
You say, “I want to be happy” or “I want to get promoted.” You claim to want to go back to graduate school, or you express an interest in someday living in a warm climate.
But then your behavior contradicts your answer, and the people who know you best get confused. You tell your boss that your goal for this year is to be more confident and assertive, but you are still the only person in meetings to raise your hand before you talk.
Here’s what should happen: your answer to this question should be so clear and vivid that it floods your senses as you drift off to sleep at night. You should practice seeing yourself as you wish yourself to be. You should meet and study people who have achieved what you want to achieve…then you should do the things they do.